Fundamentally unsound

Keith Hernandez loves to talk about the "fundys," but on Monday night, the Mets didn't exactly put on a clinic in a 7-6 loss to the Rockies, the first of a four-game set at Citi Field.

The biggest mistakes were made by the bullpen, and involved throwing and catching. First, recent callup Ryota Igarashi walked the leadoff batter, and then later blew a potential 1-2-3 double play by throwing wide to catcher Josh Thole. The inning continued and sure enough, a broken bat single past a diving Jose Reyes scored two and allowed Colorado to tie the score at 4-4.

Then it was Bobby Parnell's turn to screw up. He allowed a leadoff single in the eighth to Fowler, then a wild pitch with one out moved the runner to third. He got Carlos Gonzalez to hit a comebacker, but his throw home to get Fowler was wild as well. The meltdown was complete when the next batter, Troy Tulowitzki, hit a two-run homer. (Tulo also made a terrific play on a Daniel Murphy grounder in the seventh, stealing a hit that would have given the Mets a 5-4 lead.)

Of course, the Mets, down three, rallied for two. Wright homered, Beltran doubled and Ike "Mr. RBI" Davis singled to cut the gap to one with nobody out. But the Rockies retired the next 6 batters and that was that.

Good things: Wright's homer, Reyes with two triples, a two-run double by Willie Harris. You like to see the team continue to battle. And Mike Pelfrey was good, if not great. He settled down, but there were still too many pitches; he didn't make it through the sixth.

The bullpen has been bad so far and has already cost the team a couple of games. Doesn't mean it's going to be this way all season. Igarashi has plenty of talent. Parnell, though, is a bit of a concern. He's thought of highly, espeically by fans, but all he's really proven is that he can throw hard. He's also shown he's not ready to be the closer, or even the eighth-inning guy.

The world according to Mike (sans the Mad Dog)

So it's the day after one of the most exciting Masters finishes ever, the day after the Yankees were shut out by the Red Sox on national television to finish 1-2 in Beantown, and the Monday after the Rangers became the second team that calls Madison Square Garden home to qualify for the postseason.

And what does Mike Francesa devote almost the entire first hour to on his Monday radio program? You guessed it. The team he loves to tweak, to slam, and to belittle, when he's not flat-out ignoring them. The Mets.

I really am trying to wean myself from his show, but old habits die hard. As I went out for lunch I tuned in long enough to be annoyed, before switching to Mac and Tierney on ESPN 1050, but then I couldn't help myself and switched back to Francesa, who was still talking about:

• how the Mets couldn't beat the Nationals in a rubber game
• how Nationals "who had no business stealing bases" were stealing
• Mets ticket sales
• how he "expected more from Pagan" than what he's seen so far

and so on.

Nothing about the Yankees dropping two to Boston.

Nothing about Jeter and his .206 average, or his shocking inability to hit the ball out of the infield.

Nothing about Texeira and his .182 average.

Or Gardner hitting .167, or Posada batting .138, or Swisher — oh, how he loves Swisher — hitting a robust .219.

Nothing either about the Masters, which was funny because Francesa likes to think he's a golf aficionado. He loves talking about the majors, loves having buddy Jim Nantz on his show, loves talking about his own golf game. (I would kill to see him swing a club, either in person or on video. Must be like watching a walrus taking a slap shot. If you have video of this, please share!)

This Masters had everything. Tiger's return, a crowded leaderboard, Australians trying for history, a meltdown of Greg Normaneque proportions — and Francesa chose to lead with the Mets, who are only 4-5 but may as well fold up the tent, in his opinion.

Remarkable, but not at all surprising. It may require electroshock, but I vow to get through this season and not listen to his show. Cold turkey. Because although he may be a great source of blog material, he just isn't worth my time. Or yours.

Home opener at Citi Field: Perfect timing

A few things to note as the Mets get ready for their home opener Friday afternoon at Citi Field:

• Plenty of good seats available. I was looking on StubHub today and you can get 2 seats in the second row of Promenade Reserved behind third base for $24 each. On Opening Day. You can get seats in the Promenade Club for less than $50. And better seats if you want to fork over bigger bucks. I'll be honest, if my son didn't have a dek hockey game at 6 o'clock, I'd have bought tickets and gone.
• Home field advantage. We've heard how the Yankees have already sold 3.5 million tickets this season and the Mets only a million. No surprise there. And across baseball, attendance so far is down. Less than 10,000 a game in Cleveland? Only 18,000 in Miami for a weekend series against the Mets? Digusting. So don't be surprised if the Mets aren't drawing big numbers this weekend. With the economy and recent history, it's understandable, and I'm not one to go to a ton of games. But I'm thinking that this season, I'm going to try and go more. You can get good tickets for a reasonable price, and let's face it, the team could use all the support it can get. Hopefully I'm not the only one who feels this way and is ready to make Citi Field a true house of horrors for the opposition.
• What else can I tell you? Oh, yeah, Jason Bay hit off a tee today. Nice!
• Um... let's see... uh, Carlos Beltran is still healthy.
• And, yeah, the Phillies scored 21 runs in two days, and Jon Niese followed Mike Pelfrey's implosion with a stinker of his own, and David Wright struck out when the Mets had a first-inning chance to do damage. But hey, like Terry Collins said, a 3-3 road trip ain't bad leading into the first homestand of the season.

It's Dickey Time!

Yes, it's time to start worrying about Pelfrey

Ron Darling said it best early in the game that you learn more about a team when it's down than when it's ahead, and in that sense what we learned about the 2011 Mets is that they not only have plenty of fight in them, but they have the talent to come back and score runs.

What we also learned was that it's time to start worrying about Mike Pelfrey.

It's not just the two straight bad starts. It happens — guys start the season cold. And Pelfrey is historically worse on the road, especially in division games. But this is coming off an unimpressive spring, at a time when not just the media but the team itself made a point of how Pelfrey would need to step up and become the ace of the staff in Santana's absence.

And it's also happening on the heels of the death of sports psychologist Harvey Dorfman, with whom Pelfrey would confide after each and every start. So now you have Pelfrey — never the strongest personality — going through a tough stretch with his team counting on him, without his normal support system.

One would hope Pelfrey or the Mets have found someone to take on Dorfman's role; certainly you can't just replace someone like Dorfman with just anyone, but it seems that Pelfrey at least needs someone to be a sounding board. Again, maybe that's already happened. In any case, Pelfrey's struggles underline the fact that at least right now, the Mets are — as they were before Johan came here —  at team without a No. 1 pitcher.

Which would be fine, if everyone on the staff steps up their game. Chris Young has. R.A. Dickey has. We'll see what Niese can do tomorrow against Halladay. Capuano will get his chance soon. Hopefully, Pelfrey will snap out of it and find his way back.

Not surprisingly, Joe Blanton was hittable. He held the Mets in check while his team built a 7-0 lead, but then he melted down, so fast that Charlie Manuel couldn't get a replacement ready fast enough.

I loved seeing Pagan homer after working in the dugout with Dave Hudgens, and Keith Hernandez was all over that. Loved seeing the five run rally started by the top of the order, with clutch hits by Ike Davis (again) and Daniel Murphy (in his second at-bat of the inning).

Didn't love seeing them give two runs right back WITH TWO OUTS, but that was weird, wasn't it? A cheapo double by Victorino, a bad job of letting Polanco single after having him down 0-2, and then that infield single off Boyer's glove. Ugh.

The Mets are showing they can score and be resilient. Let's see if they can keep it going against Halladay.

Nothing like a Broad Street beatdown

No one gives the Mets much of a chance this season. Beat writers, radio hosts, national columnists, you name it. They all think the Mets will be lucky to be .500, or bad enough to finish alongside the Nationals at the bottom of the division. (Seriously.) Jose Reyes will be traded, so will K-Rod — whatever.

It's kind of amazing considering the amount of talent on the roster. Even without Jason Bay, this team should hit, and it is hitting. The bench is much better. The bullpen is revamped. The starting pitching is a question without Johan, but Mike Pelfrey has improved each year, Jonathon Niese is good and has a ton or promise, and R.A. Dickey is R.A. Dickey.

Is it because the fourth and fifth starters are Chris Young and Chris Capuano? Two guys that have won before and are coming off injuries? Is that it?

Well, Young had a terrific spring and on Tuesday night he laid the smack down — for 5 1/3 innings, anyway — on a depleted Phillies team that started the season 3-0 against the less-than-intimidating Astros. Young battled through the wind and the cold, struck out seven and made Ryan Howard look foolish, eliciting a groundout with the bases loaded in a key spot in the bottom of the fifth, when the Phillies had a chance to cut into the Mets' big lead.

The hole was a large one because the Mets once again made Cole Hamels their bitch. Hamels is 2-9 against the Mets in his career, and when you consider the fact that the Mets have had some success in the past against Roy Oswalt, and Joe Blanton is average at best, that's 3/5 of the Phillies' vaunted rotation that doesn't scare anyone in blue and orange.

Sure, Halladay and Lee are HALLADAY AND LEE, but suddenly — no Lidge, no Utley — the Phils have some chinks in the armor. And judging by the first few games, these Mets are ready to shut people up.

David Wright — worth every penny of the $42 I spent on him in my fantasy baseball league — had four hits and Young himself had three. The Mets are getting on base, hitting, moving runners around, playing aggressively. Terry Collins likes to use his bench, keeping those guys sharp. So far, he has managed, paraphrasing Bobby Ojeda, not for approval, but to win.

I heard Joe Benigno say that he would take one of three in Philly. Why stop there? Hamels, as we've seen, can be beaten and the Mets beat him all the time. Blanton? Beatable. Halladay? OK, pencil that one in for the Phils, but these Mets should feel that they can take two games in Philly against a team that is less than full strength.

They're halfway there.

Len Dykstra: Philosopher King

Who knew Len Dykstra was so tight with Charlie Sheen? Then again, is anyone really surprised?

John Clark of NBC10 interviewed Lenny D recently and the result was some of the most entertaining television since "Winter Wipeout." There are several clips to choose from, but you must watch all of them.

Here are some choice quotes from one of our favorite centerfielders:

On his dislike for the chumminess of players today: "No talking to the other team. We're going to go into their yard, take their money and f*ck their women. That's what we're going to do."

"I see guys striking out 185 times. I could go up there without a bat and not strike out 185 times. I'm not kidding."

On his new rule regarding firing people: "You f*ck me once, I put you on probation. You f*ck me twice, I put you on death row. You f*ck me three times, I execute you. Execute you the way I fire you. No tears. There's no crying in baseball."

On his critics: "What matters is all those people, they'll be shining my shoes, OK? And they'll all come back wanting to suck my d*ck, which they will. Guess what I'll tell them? You have any idea? Yeah, go f*ck yourself."

On the "torture" that Mitch Williams put him through: "What do you mean? The guy hit barrel after barrel, dude. What do you mean, what did he put me through? He lost the World Series."

Awe. Some.

It's funny that Dykstra is loved in both New York and Philadelphia for being such a key figure on each town's pennant-winning teams. I wonder if Dykstra feels closer to New York since he won a World Series here, but he seems tight with both fan bases.

I'd love to see the Mets embrace Dykstra as a spokesperson, fitting given both parties' financial issues. I can see Lenny greeting fans in the rotunda, shrugging his shoulders with his pockets turned out, like the Monopoly man.

Dykstra also talks a bit about his good friend Sheen, and if there was ever a reality show that needs to be made it's one that follows these two guys around.

Duh, winning!